A Whisper Campaign

A Whisper Campaign

June 5, 2018

Heidelberg, Germany

Guten tag from Heideleberg.

Before we begin, if you are long time readers, you are probably asking yourself these questions:

Has she gotten lost yet?  Yes, of course.

Has she locked herself out of her apartment? Yes, of course.

Has her water been turned off unexpectedly? Yes.

Has she done anything illegal?  Maybe.

Has she had any experiences worth reading about?  It depends on what your standards are.

My husband is teaching a class here, so I’m back once again to pester the Germans, or at least make a few of them guffaw or at least snicker into their beer steins. 

Currently, I’m in the University of Heidelberg Library being buzzed by a very large black fly.   I’ve already gotten into trouble once since entering the library, so I’m trying not to bring more bad attention to myself.  I think that my sweat is attracting the fly as I’ve just trekked 6,702 steps and countless stairs to get here. Of course, my Google Maps konked out when I was in the vicinity and I only walked an extra half mile or so before giving up and asking for directions.  I was told to keep walking until I saw a bunch of people outside smoking.  And here I am.

Why am I here?  I was tipped off by U of Heidelberg law student that the library offers quiet, air-conditioned rooms for study.  Since our apartment is not air conditioned, that sounded most appealing.  Well, I would say that the A/C here is probably set a few degrees cooler than I leave my house when I’m going on vacation, but who’s complaining?  However, it is certainly quiet here.  When I came in to ask if I might study (that’s a very loose interpretation of what I’m actually doing; I hope no one comes to check on me…) , the woman at the information desk replied, “Yes, but first you’ll need to lower your voice.” All right, already. Furthermore, even the tour guides in the hallway whisper to the students they are showing through the library.  Absolutely not talking aloud is allowed. Now this rule is to be enforced on a girl who once spent an hour with her nose in a circle on a chalkboard for talking during study hall?  Never mind.  I know I can do it.

 Since no bags are allowed, I had to take my purse deep into a back basement room to put it in a locker. The stress of finding the locker room and the key and remembering to retrieve my euro are almost paralyzing me…

The law student also told me that I could only access WiFi here at the library if I used his login and password.  He insisted on providing both to me.  My, he is a trusting fellow.  Doesn’t he know what I can do with such information?  Why I could be stealing his identity right at this minute or even becoming a German spy.  But since I have tried every possible configuration of the info he gave me to get on the internet and I haven’t succeeded in so much as checking my Facebook – which is probably illegal in the room I’m in anyway – I think he knows exactly what I can do with his info.  Who needs the internet anyway?  I will get back to what I do best:  wasting my time and others’,too.  Thanks for joining me.

So, what are we up to?  Just like last summer, all the TV shows are in German.  Can you believe it?  But that doesn’t stop Bob.  He watched an entire episode of Chicago PD in German.  As long as someone is being beaten up, chased, or shot, he ‘s happy.   

We are in a studio apartment.  That means no couch, no chairs, only a bed on which to sit.  We are living very simply.  Since I’ve been on Weight Watchers the past six weeks, Bob says I’ve even cured him of hunger.  That’s great as now we don’t even have to eat.  That saves a lot of time.

We wandered around on the weekend.  At the riverfront, we saw a boat cruise ready to take off.  We ran and got on, even though we didn’t know where the boat was going.  As long as it came back in three hours, we didn’t care.  By the way, it was going to Neckarsteinach.  Do you care?  Neither did we.

We also went to a British movie that was in English.  It was called  Tanz  In Leben or “Finding Your Feet.”  It’s about love and life in ,dare I say, very late middle age.  As we find with most British productions ,  Bob and I could have had starring roles in the film, Weight Watchers or no Weight Watchers.  And we have better teeth, too.  Nonetheless, it was a very entertaining movie that will no doubt make its way to the U.S. eventually.

Well, it’ time for me to locate my stuff and trek back home.  Wish me luck.  Just because I found my way here in no way ensures that I will find my way home.  Wish me luck!

Next time we’ll talk garbage, recycling, and laundry.  Don’t miss  it.

Silent but dead-on,

I remain

Tizzie/Tiz/Liz/Elizabeth/Tizmom/Mom/Grandma Tizzie/Grizzie/Frau O'Connell