Blogpost April 2, 2020
TP Count: 52
PT Count: 8.5 (including 6 jumbo rolls)
Hi, friends, fam, and frenemies,
So, you’ve decided to do some slacking? Well, you’ve come to the right place. Besides nothing, what have you had time to do while under house arrest?
Here’s what I’ve had time to do….
Carry off a proper April Fool’s Day joke. Check out Nancy O’Connell’s FB page if you want to further investigate the "smoking toilet" above...
Catch in the act the dog that’s been doing its business in our back yard and sic my husband on him (the owner, that is). That one was interesting.
Open up my new vacuum cleaner that’s been in the box for a month and figure out how to use it. My old one has been duct-taped together for quite some time. It’s so traumatic to learn to use new devices. Things didn’t go well. Of course, I didn’t read the directions. I never understand them anyway and can never find the parts the red arrows are pointing to. So, it was just good old trial and error. I wondered if vacuuming off the screened porch was the best way to start…. With any luck, it is charged and will turn on today. And the dirt thingie will open up. Wish me luck. I always need it.
Make a real grocery list and categorize it by aisles and departments and write it out in lovely cursive, something that some of you female readers of a certain age still know how to do. It’s one of my few talents that impresses my children. And I even managed to get to the store with the list.
Figure out – due to several rainstorms - the origin of the water in the garage. I have insisted for years that it is seeping up through the cracks in the floor. My husband has insisted that it is coming in due to a piece of rubber missing from the seal at the bottom of the garage door. After much scientific review, well, you don’t really care, do you? And I don’t want to look bad.
Observe a squirrel violate our “guaranteed squirrel-free” bird feeder. He only got as far as the water, but now I have a reason to stand at my kitchen window all day and gather evidence.
Learn how to host a baby shower on Zoom. And I thought having one in my house was bad. I’d much rather make an egg casserole than learn how to download an app, create a password, remember the password, invite attendees (I often end up inviting my whole contact list in these situations, so if you receive an invite and you have no idea who “Amy” is, please ignore it.), and hold forth (well, that part I think I can actually do) for an hour while we all watch the mother-to-be gush over her gifts. My daughter says there’s nothing to it. I’ll let you know. Feel free to Zoombomb us if you can figure out how.
Take long walks. In fact, I was taking one earlier this week at a nearby trail when my sister happened to call (imagine that). I was talking to her as I finished the loop. Unbeknownst to me, my husband was reading a book at a picnic table under the nearby shelter. He commented that while trying to concentrate on his book he had heard “some loud-mouthed broad talking on the phone” and had wondered why a she couldn’t take a walk without talking on the phone. Well, I’m always happy to be in people’s thoughts, no matter what those thoughts are.
Smokin’ and jokin’,
I remain
Tizzie/Tiz/Tizmom/Liz/Elizabeth/Mom/Grandma/Grizzie
