The Wedding Blog

The Wedding Blog

October 21,  2012 (Written in Oct, but just posted 12/26/12)

                  You are probably wondering why I’ve waited nearly two  months to write  (and four months to post) the wedding blog. Those of you who have married off daughters haven’t asked.   You know that I am still in recovery.  Oh, no, I’m not in the hospital or anything like that.  I’m just slowly working my way back  to join you in total slackerdom.  Why, Bob and I are even planning to do something my parents did weekly, but we’ve rarely done in 36 years. Those of you with dirty minds, stop it!  We are going for a ride through the country. Yep. We are driving down to Hermann to take part in the consummate geezer activity: looking at the leaves.  I would never have dreamed of such an unproductive venture before August 25.  How could I have explained an entire wasted day?  Well, I have no one to answer to these days, so I am back to my old tricks.

                As I look around, I see constant reminders of the wedding:

10 – 15 square envelopes that were addressed wrong that now have 65 cent stamps permanently affixed to them and white out slathered over the addresses.  If I follow family tradition, these will probably be sitting in the same spot in my kitchen desk 20 years from now.

Several pages of leftover “LOVE” stamps. No, I don’t love all of you, so just ignore the stamp if you should get one on card from me.

3 baskets of wedding cards, receipts, lists, contracts, etc.  If Mary were here, she would toss them all immediately, but somehow I am afraid that I will toss just the item that will be needed 6 months from now when it’s discovered that the mixer doesn’t work or the china was, in fact, broken in transit.  Or, God forbid, that a thank you note was not written?  You see my dilemma.  Did I mention that my mother still has the receipts for her wedding suit, hat, and shoes as well as the movie magazine she read on the train on the way to her Chicago honeymoon?

A plastic bag filled with wedding fans.  When I consider the cost, labor, and angst that these fan/wedding programs extracted from all of us, I can’t bring myself to toss them out.  I wonder if they would sell on eBay?  You never know.  Molly and/or Cody could become world famous (or even world infamous in this day and age) someday and those would be worth a lot of money.  A savvy investor would scoop them up. I wonder if they’d like the leftover sticks, Modge Podge, and slim pink ribbon, too?

Several dresses -including the bride’s – and pairs of shoes and purses that have never made it anywhere beyond where they were dropped at the end of the wedding.  At least the wedding dress has been in a bag sort of draped on a bed.

So, you see, the wedding is still with me every day.  But, you might ask, what about the wedding itself?

Thinking of it makes me happy and sad.  There were a few moments that give an MOB a start..

My husband at the rehearsal pointing to me and saying to monsignor in all seriousness, “So, I just follow her down the aisle, right?”  Monsignor kindly reminded him that he would be walking someone else down the aisle….

Nancy trying on her bridesmaid dress on Thursday, breaking the zipper and then being unable to get OUT of the dress without incident.  Luckily, a very kind soul and wonderful seamstress  friend saved us from ourselves once again.

But, here’s what I remember best…

The happy couple .

The toast by my husband that was so heartfelt and exceptional that several people came up to me afterwards an asked me if I had written it..I hadn't.

Suddenly getting teary-eyed  at the kitchen sink the day after the wedding as I basked in the joy of having my entire  extended family there  -and they were all healthy and happy  -  for breakfast.  Something came over me, and I felt like the luckiest person on earth.  Maybe I am.

Lucky and plucky, 

I remain

Tizzie/Tiz/Tizmom/Mom/Liz/ Elizabeth

P.S.  I would  have posted a wedding photo, but all I seem to find on my computer is this one of my girls from the bridesmaid luncheon.  It'll have to do until one of my kids takes pity on me and helps me find all the photos I keep downloading but never locating on my laptop.

Briding My Time

Hi, friends, fam, and frenemies,

In eleven short days, I will take my final.  I have certainly been cramming.  Why I can't tell you how many nights I have gotten up at 2:00 AM to study for this test, usually by lying wide-awake on the couch wide-eyed watching an old Alfred Hitchcock movie while  fretting over such important details as what vases the bridesmaids are going to put their flowers in at the wedding or what pillow a three-year-old is going to use to carry a fake ring down the aisle (footnote:  he will NOT be carrying the antique Coady heirloom from Mom's house as it disintegrated at the cleaners earlier this week..)  I must say I have learned a lot.  I ran across my notes from the beginning of this crash course and nearly laughed aloud at my initial cost projections. What was I thinking?

You would think that since I got married myself a few decades back that I would know a few things about weddings.  Boy, was I wrong.  Here's what I remember...

Mother of the Bride Dress
My mother wore the same dress  to my wedding that she already had from Bob and Mary's weddings a couple years earlier:  a classy light green polyester long number with big stripes at the waist,  green covered buttons, a nice over-sized collar,  with lovely white beads and matching  hoop earrings to accent it.   There were no frantic trips to the big city or online orders and returns involved.  Nor did she go on a diet or color her hair. However, she did rat her hair for the occasion.   Also,  I can say with certainty that she never lost a moment's sleep over the preparations for my wedding.

Bride
Believe it or not, I did my own hair, make up, and nails!  A quick look at my wedding photos indicates that my teeth appear to have been sufficiently white.


Flowers
I don't remember even going to the florist.  I suspect that we called Helfrich's and said, "We need wedding flowers."  I must not have learned  flower names as when I recently brought home some "practice" flowers for centerpieces, my friend pointed out that they were carnations, NOT daisies.  I still don't believe her, and I plan to Google it first chance I get..


Registry
Irma Jane of the local hardware store  - who just happened to be my aunt's BFF and was at least 80 at the time - told me what I needed, put it on a table with my name on it, and people went in and bought things off the table.  You know what?  She was right.  I used my dark brown Pyrex today.  For fine items, I walked a half block to Paragraph's and picked out life's essentials like pewter napkin rings and little birds' nest decorations..

I could go on, but I'm afraid  the sleeping bride-to-be might wake up and catch me doing something non-wedding related.  Why aren't I working on the programs? The photo list? The "day of" agenda???  Why aren't I adding  jokes and asides to Bob's wedding toast (I have that done that, thank you very much)? Why am I sitting here in my jammies blogging with only 8 days to go???  Well, dear readers, you know why.  Because at heart I am  like you. --- a slacker.  I much prefer talking about things to actually doing them.

So, wish me luck on my final   I'm crossing my fingers and hoping for at least a C+.

 The photo attached is Molly in my wedding gown.  Doesn't she look beautiful? I might shed a tear or two if I had the time..

Prepping and schlepping,
I remain
Tizzie/Tiz/Tizmom/Liz/Mom/Elizabeth

Veiled Accusations

Good morning, Friends and Fam,

Unless you’ve hiding  under a rock – move over, I’d love to join you – you must know that I am about to become an MOB.  That’s right, Molly is getting married.  She has picked Cody, a fine young man that we are thrilled to welcome into the family.  She is in a  gaze-at-her-ring dream state when she’s not in near -bridezilla mode.  Of course, her wrath falls on guess who?  Her mother, who else?  She thinks that I am not taking all of this seriously enough and that I have not been doing my part to create the Wedding of the Century.  What do I have against ice sculptures?  Seat covers? Just what color dress do I intend to wear?   Have I called the _____________ (fill in the blank: bakery, florist, photographer,  seamstress, videographer, .......) Why NOT??? Well, you get the picture.  I'm thinking of filing a sexual harassment suit as I she hasn't demanded a thing of her father who is in the father-of-the bride mode of looking at his little girl nostalgically ,and ,when he looks up from a book, feigning excitement at her big day.  In the meantime, I've been accused of being a cheap neglectful lazy slob or worse.  Little does she know that I have been busier than ever since her big announcement.  Here's what I've done/had done/ or am having done:

replaced the deck (we wouldn't want you to see what it's really looked like all these years)

painted the bathroom (ditto)

painted the hallway and front door (ditto)

redone Molly's bedroom (ditto)

removed wallpaper from ktichen walls (ditto)

gotten my wedding dress and veil cleaned for Molly to try on (for the heck of it)

joined Weight Watchers (don't want you to see what I really look like)

gotten  my first pair of soft contacts (ditto)

made an appt for a dental implant (ditto)

tried a new hair color (ditto)

And the list goes on.  As you can see, I've been BUSY.  What more can I do??  Last week my sister told me that I need to start "working on my feet".  Dear me!  When am I going to fit that in?

Molly is coming next week and once again my motherly abilities will be put to the test.  I promise to listen attentively to possible color choices, table decoration ideas, bridesmaid adornments, etc. etc.  Meanwhile, I'll be "working on my feet."  Wish me luck!

Getting MOB-ed,

I remain,

Tizzie/Tiz/Tizmom/Mom/Liz/Elizabeth/Mother-of-the-Bride

Some Tiz Advice:  Something to NOT do in a hurry minutes before leaving for work:  wax your upper lip.  And make SURE you have baby oil on hand for after the waxing. The details are painful, but suffice it to say, I drove to work picking wet kleenex out of my tache!  And I had a glob of sticky substance on my face all day..I'll try not to do that on the day of the wedding...Furthermore, I LOST the lid to my hot wax.  Don't ask me how.  Trouble just follows me around. .. I'm also looking for my camera.  Please let me know if you see it.  It's a Canon.. I had a great pic of Molly wearing my wedding dress, but it will remain unseen until my camera shows up.

Tiz Shares Her Beauty Secrets and More.....

Good day, Blogpals,

I guess you're put away your wrapping paper, organized your gifts, and written your thank you notes or you wouldn't be reading this, right? Well, at least go set a mousetrap to make yourself feel useful. (Aside: I must ashamedly admit that my son Tim has become a heartless mouse catcher. The first time he had to put a trapped mouse out of its misery before disposing of it, he was traumatized. Not anymore! He has ratcheted up the quality of his mousetraps and claims to have the surefire method to keeping those pesky critters out of the garage even if he does live on the prarie and back up to a field.)

You probably think I had forgotten you. But actually I have months' worth of blog notes scribbled everywhere. So, here goes...

Recently, Mary, Mom, and I flew to Florida for a wedding. I rented a car at the airport and needed to find my way to the beach side hotel at 11:30 PM. Anyone who knows me knows that me finding my way from Park Place to Boardwalk is an accomplishment. However, I was prepared. I had typed the address in my phone's navigation system (which I had used at least once before). Of course, I couldn't check a map or a phone once I got the car as it was late, dark, and I was alone in the airport lot. I've read enough true crime books to know not to look distracted and confused -- an extremely hard task for me as that's the way I appear most of the time. So, out I went without knowing anything more than how to turn on the car. If you ever rent cars, you know that an important step is familiarizing yourself with the knobs, buttons, etc. Well, I had no time for that; someone might get me. So, I pushed the button on my phone and said a prayer. Despite not being able to see out of either of my side mirrors (couldn't figure out how to adjust them), I was cruising along quite well holding my phone up to my ear to hear the directions. My cousin called a few times and disturbed my directions, but I didn't answer it and sojourned on. I was thankful that it was a clear calm night, especially since I had no idea how to turn on the wipers. I thought I was home free when, all at once, water deluged my windows. A hotel was watering its lawn... Well, I blindly started pushing, pulling, and turning knobs. I finally located the wipers and I --- as well as Pensacola, Florida--- was saved. It was only a few miles later that I noticed that I had somehow turned off my lights. Oh, well, I did get there. Nobody got me, and I didn't get anybody either.

Nancy has recently had a few interviews for internships. Outfitting her properly has been quite an ordeal. I thought back to what I wore when I got my first job. It was a lovely royal blue sleeveless polyester mini dress, belted and trimmed in white. I complemented it with tall white open-toe clog sandals. Of course, I had on the standard suntan hose and large dangling hoop earrings which peeked out from my shag haircut. It worked for me. And, obviously, my mother wasn't the least bit involved in what I wore...

Recent Tizhap...One morning as I was hurriedly getting ready for work, catastrophe struck: I dropped my blush in the toilet. In the words of a friend whose name I can't mention, I was "devastated.". I had no extra Cover Girl classic pinks in the cabinet. What was a girl to do? Well, I pinched my cheeks and bravely went forth... certain that someone would comment on my changed appearance. After all, I have worn Cover Girl classic pink my entire life. I must look as weird to others as I did to myself. When I forget to wear eyeliner, I inevitably get asked if I'm feeling okay or if I'm tired. Guess what? I was without blush for three days and no one said a word. And when I finally had a chance to get more, Walgreens was out of classic pink! Since I wasn't going home soon where I could steal one of my mother's classic pinks, I was forced to settle for Maybelline medium pink. I brushed it on ferociously each morning, but somehow it just didn't look right. You'll be relieved to know that Target was not out of classic pink, so now I am back in the pink -- the classic pink-- once again. Surely, you've noticed, right?...And one more (I want to throw away these scribbled notes), while on our trip to Fl I must have spaced out while purchasing my ticket -- or more likely the computer made a mistake -- my ticket had my name with a "Jr" after it, so now I'll have to add one more name to the list below. I was afraid that I wouldn't be allowed to board the plane as my I.D. didn't match my ticket, but I must have looked innocuous enough..

Flushing and blushing,
I remain
Tizzie/Tiz/Tizmom/Mom/Liz/Elizabeth/Elizabeth, Jr.